Monday, January 9, 2012


Ever have one of those moments when you just have to break the shit out of everything? That every person you talk to comes off as mockingly normal? And if you don't know what I mean by mockingly normal, it is when every single thing done by every single person annoys you, to the point where you mumble to yourself, "yeah, drink that coffee asshole, drink it and act like you don't even know that I'm here, now just walk away pretending like you don't think I'm a piece of shit, you bastard, I hope you choke to death on a biscotti."

Well, I like to think that I never really have those moments, but I do, I've thrown things, crumpled things, snarled... yes, snarled, screamed obscenities, and jumped around howling at the unbelievable stupid that just keeps trying to ram itself down my throat. And the anger always eventually breaks through whatever mantra I am repeating to try and keep it in check, "I am cool, calm, and in control... No, not today."

To illustrate this I have picked out some scenes I think illustrate these moments, because, I think that freaking out once and a while keeps us from drinking death from a straw made of gun metal for at least a few more days.

5) John Belushi is an easy going guy in "Animal House", but I feel that his response to annoying guy with an acoustic guitar is warranted. Cause if you are that guy who brings his guitar to a party to pick up chicks with your bland three chord non-melody and cottage cheese lyrics than seriously, shove it up your ass.
No Embedding... I'll put my fist through my own god damn monitor.

4) John Goodman plays Walter, and Walter is back from Nam, and for some reason he thinks that gives him a blank check to wave his gun around and be dick. All that aside though "The Big Lebowski" has several moments when he goes on psychotic rants that could create their own list in this format, that being said there is one moment that is rather notorious, and I think of it somewhat often.
No Embedding? Why?

3) Jack Nicholson could pretty much just have a list to himself, for god sake the man has committed so many murders on film it boarders on the grotesque. He has ranted, punched, shot, and chopped his way to awards and a cult following. To him I chose one of the most over the top break up scenes in film. "The Witches of Eastwick", honestly, he's the Devil, so maybe this could be construed as restrained.
Really? Embedding Disabled by request. Fine! Link!

2) Nicholas Cage is the God of insane bullshit. He has built his entire career around it. No one can scream "fuck" as loud and long as he can. So here is one of his earlier works from a movie I don't think I ever want to see, "Zandalee". This is the birth of the Maestro of insanity.

Kind of makes me think of "Paint it Black", and I often wonder if I should sit down and cover myself in paint while wailing.

1) Michael Douglas is not really known for freak outs the way that Cage and Nicholson are, one might say he is more known for being either a weasel, or the upper class but straight talking guy the audience likes, which is why I love the movie "Falling Down". The whole movie is an ever escalating series of freak outs, at everything from douche bag convenience store owners, to fast food, to gang members, neo-Nazis, and urban reconstruction. I love this, because it is a guy who is at the end of his rope and like Spolsion Man he just keeps going off and picking up steam as he does so. Any scene of his from that movie could be here, so I'll put one of the simpler ones.
Again with the disabled? The hell are they hiding this from?

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